Abba Father thank You for my wife/husband you have given me. Thank you for how far You have brought us. You have proven to be faithful. You have proven to be present. You have proven to be good to us. My heart overflows with praise and thanksgiving to You.
Reflecting on our marriage, I am convicted that I haven’t always been the wife/husband You designed me to be, nor the wife/husband (insert your spouse’s name) needs. I confess the times I have been disrespectful in words, attitudes and deeds. I see it as You do – sin. Remove any bitterness, selfishness and impatience from my heart and in its place, plant ready forgiveness, patience and the willingness to bear all things.
Make me kind Lord. Make me gentle. Give me a heart of flesh. Transform my heart into a gentle, grace extending one. Make me faithful and teach me Your ways. Not only in body, but also in the way I speak and behave towards my spouse.
Make me the kind of wife/husband who (insert your spouse’s name) knows I will not do or say anything to degrade or devalue him/her, but that he/she can safely trust me (Her/his wife’s/husband’s heart trusts in her/him and she/he lacks nothing valuable – Proverbs 31:11). Renew my mind so that I can judge my words and actions based on Your truth and not just on how I feel. Let my husband/wife know that I will bring him/her good and not evil all the days of my life.
Abba Father, I know my first and foremost ministry is to (insert spouse’s name). Remind me of this often throughout the day, seeking ways to bless him/her with my body, words and actions. When words are inappropriate, guard my tongue. Help me to discern and choose when to speak and when to remain quiet, pointing (insert spouses name) to you, the purity and reverence of my life (1 Peter 3:1-7 see below).
Lord, out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks, as you word says in Luke 6:45 – “Out of the good treasure of his heart the good man brings forth good, and out of evil the evil man brings forth evil. For from the overflow of the heart his mouth speaks.” Keep the words of my mouth and the meditation of my own heart pleasing to You (Also keep Your servant from wilful sins. May they not have dominion over me? Then I will be blameless, free from great transgression Psalm 19:14). Purge my heart so my words may only be encouraging and up-building to those around me. Help me know that sometimes my words are wrong no matter how right I am.
Transform me, Lord – remind me to not expect (insert spouses name) to fulfill me in ways only You can. Help me lay all my expectations, hopes, dreams, disappointments and struggles at Your feet. Help me accept (insert spouses name) in his/her place and not try to change him/her into what I want him/her to be. At the same time, I release (insert spouses name) to You to mold and shape and grow into the man/woman You created (insert spouses name) to be: a man/ woman so much greater than I could ever hope to make of (insert spouse’s name).
Help me daily, work in me to become (insert spouses name) husband/wife of his/her dreams. One (insert spouses name) can love easily, trust fully, laugh with, cry with and grow old with. Make me new; totally transformed, fitting perfectly into his/her plan You have for him/her life and our marriage. Amen.
I declare we put You first Yeshua over everything. I commit myself and (insert spouses name) wholeheartedly to you.
IN ABUSIVE SITUATIONS
We encourage anyone who is in an abusive relationship to please reach out to someone for help. If not someone at Soldiers 4 Christ, then please go to someone you can trust – remember you are not alone.
Adonai is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer. My God is my rock, in Him I take refuge, my shield, my horn of salvation, my stronghold and my refuge, my Saviour – You save me from violence. I called upon Adonai, worthy of praise, and I was rescued from my enemies – 2 Samuel 22:2-4
For this reason I also am suffering these things – but I am not ashamed, for I know in whom I have trusted and I am convinced He is able to safeguard what I have entrusted to Him until that day – 2 Timothy 1:12
Adonai will protect me from all evil. He will guard my life Adonai will watch over my coming and my going from this time forth and forevermore – Psalm 121:7-8
Finally, I am strong in the Lord and in His mighty power. I put on the full Armour of God, so that I am able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For my struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the worldly forces of this darkness, and against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore, I take up the full Armour of God so that I may be able to resist when the times are evil, and after I have done everything, I now stand firm – Ephesians 6:10-13
Abba show me what you need me to do as I continue to wait on You.
See our spiritual warfare chapters on binding up strongholds and our teachings on knowing your real enemy. Get strong and equipped, your weapons of warfare are not against flesh and blood.
SCRIPTURES TO STUDY AND MEMORIZE
Search me, O God, and know my heart. Examine me and know my anxious thoughts, and see if there be any offensive way within me, and lead me in the way everlasting – Psalm 139:23-24
So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself – Ephesians 5:28
With what shall I come before Adonai? With what shall I bow myself before God on high? Shall I present Him with burnt offerings, with year-old calves? Will Adonai be pleased with thousands of rams, with hordes of rivers of oil? Shall I offer my firstborn for my transgression, the fruit of my belly for the sin of my soul? He has told you humanity what is good, and what Adonai is seeking from you: Only to practice justice, to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God – Micah 6: 8
Therefore as you received Messiah Yeshua as Lord, so continue to walk in Him – rooted and built up in Him and established in your faith just as you were taught, overflowing with thankfulness. See that no one takes you captive through philosophy and empty deception, according to the tradition of men and the basic principles of the world rather than Messiah – Colossians 2:6-8
Likewise, wives, be submitted to your own husbands so that – even if some do not obey the message – by the wives’ conduct, without a word they may be won over as they observe your pure, reverent conduct. Don’t let your beauty be external – braiding the hair and wearing gold jewelry or fine clothes. Instead let it be in the hidden person of the heart, with the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. For this is the way the holy women, who put their hope in God, used to beautify themselves long ago – being submitted to their own husbands, just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. You have become her daughters by doing what is good and not fearing intimidation. In the same way, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way. Though they are weaker partners, honor them as equal heirs of the grace of life. In this way, your prayers will not be hindered – 1 Peter 3:1-7
And calling them over, Yeshua said to them, “You know those recognized as rulers of the nations lord it over them, and their great ones play the tyrant over them. Yet it is not this way among you. But whoever wants to be great among you shall be your servant, and whoever wants to be first among you shall be slave of all. For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:42-45
Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear Adonai and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your body and refreshment to your bones – Proverbs 3:7-8
Listen to wise counsel – listen to advice and accept instruction, so that in the end you may be wise. Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but the counsel of Adonai will stand – Proverbs 19:20-21
Receive my instruction instead of silver and knowledge rather than choice gold. For wisdom is better than jewels, nothing you desire compares with her. “I, wisdom, dwell with prudence, and acquire knowledge with discretion” – Proverbs 8:10-12
You, however, continue in what you have learned and what you have become convinced of. For you know from whom you have learned, and that from childhood you have known the sacred writings that are able to make you wise, leading to salvation through trusting in Messiah Yeshua. All Scripture is inspired by God and useful for teaching, for reproof, for restoration, and for training in righteousness, so that the person belonging to God may be capable, fully equipped for every good deed – 2 Timothy 3:14-17
Now for this very reason, making every effort, add to your faith virtue; and to virtue, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, patience; and to patience, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly love; and to brotherly love, love. For if these qualities are in you and increasing, they keep you from becoming idle and unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Yeshua the Messiah- 2 Peter 1: 5-8
Walk now in eternal privileges: I wrote these things to you who believe in the name of Ben-Elohim, so you may know that you have eternal life. Now this is the confidence we have before Him – that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us – whatever we ask – we know that we have the requests we have asked from Him – 1 John 5:13-15
And He said to them, “Because you trust so little. Amen, I tell you, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there, and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.” – Matthew 17:20-21
I call the heavens and the earth to witness about you today, that I have set before you life and death, the blessing and the curse. Therefore choose life so that you and your descendants may live, by loving Adonai your God, listening to His voice, and clinging to Him. For He is your life and the length of your days, that you may dwell on the land that Adonai swore to your fathers – to Abraham, to Isaac and to Jacob – to give them – Deuteronomy 30:15-20
Seek treasures of Wisdom My son, if you accept My words and treasure My mitzvot within you, making your ear attentive to wisdom, inclining your heart to discernment, yes, if you call out for insight, lifting up your voice for discernment – Proverbs 2:1-3
A call to be Holy – so brace your minds for action. Keep your balance. And set your hope completely on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Yeshua the Messiah. Like obedient children, do not be shaped by the cravings you had formerly in your ignorance. Instead, just like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in everything you do. For it is written “Kedoshim you shall be, for I am kadosh.” – 1 Peter 1:13-16 (“Kedoshim” means to be set apart)
For through the grace given me, I say to everyone among you not to think more highly of yourself than you ought to think – but to use sound judgement, as God has assigned to each person a measure of faith – Romans 12:3
Do nothing out of selfishness or conceit, but with humility consider others as more important than yourselves, looking out not only for your own interests but also for the interests of others. Have this attitude in yourselves, which also was in Messiah Yeshua, who though existing in the form of God, did not consider being equal to God, a thing to be grasped. But He emptied Himself – taking on the form of a slave, becoming the likeness of men and being found in appearance as a man. He humbled Himself – becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross – Philippians 2:3-8
Let love be without hypocrisy – detesting what is evil, holding fast to the good. Be tenderly devoted to one another in brotherly love; outdo one another in giving honour – Romans 12:9-10
Now may the God of patience and encouragement grant you to be like-minded with one another in the manner of Messiah Yeshua, so that together with one voice you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Yeshua the Messiah – Romans 15:5-7
Let no harmful word come out of your mouth, but only what is beneficial for building others up according to the need, so that it gives grace to those who hear it. Do not grieve the Ruach Haccodesh of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness and rage and anger and quarreling and slander, along with all malice. Instead, be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving each other just as God in Messiah also forgave you – Ephesians 4:29-32